“I choose me.“
My lovely friend Jessica Klein, who has since passed away, wrote that line for Kelly Taylor on Season 5 of Beverly Hills 90210. Almost 30 years later, I could have never imagined how much the three words would mean to me.
Three children, a divorce, a second marriage, a blended family, different jobs, surgeries, scars and a whole lot of life later, I can honestly say that I like my journey, and I like it the most when I choose me.
At 52, I’ve had to make a lot of life choices. Some have been triumphant, and some have been more major learning lessons. A few years ago, I was feeling really lost. I was bored; I was depressed. I felt stuck. It felt like there was a giant rock living inside of me. People always talk about their ‘purpose,’ and I didn’t know mine. I wanted to find it. Something kept urging me to look back to move forward.
When I looked back, I kept seeing that line: ‘I choose me.’ It kept coming up. What started as part of the script for the great Dylan-Brendan-Kelly love triangle took on a life of its own.
That phrase started to become the most important thing in my vocabulary. I started writing it. I started saying it. I started living it. I started believing it. And I have never been happier.
Starting two new businesses—the QVC fashion line ‘Me by Jennie Garth,’ and my iHeart podcast, I Choose Me with Jennie Garth—after age 50 were both huge ‘I choose me’ moments.
I had to be very clear about what I wanted. I had to allow myself to be fearlessly brave and confident.
Sure, they are both businesses, but they are also very vulnerable and personal pursuits. They are projects that I hope will only propel female empowerment and community. I also hope that they spark cultural conversations that aren’t being had elsewhere, and in doing so, initiate a movement that’s bigger than just me…one that is emboldening women to choose healing, choose happiness, and to live by the words ‘I Choose Me!’
“You sort of have to ask yourself what you want for the next chapter.”
I truly hope to create a space for women, specifically those over 50, that encourages them to embrace their own journeys of self-discovery and self-love. And, if I can rewrite some of the false narratives about aging that society has conditioned us to believe, even better!
As you get older, you sort of have to ask yourself what you want for the next chapter. And, that’s a lot easier to do that when you know what you like and what you don’t like, and you are clear on both.
I recently opened the pages of my journal and read about the time I was feeling immensely stuck. I love reading what I dumped on the pages back then… and taking time to reflect on where I am now. Writing down our thoughts and reflecting on that moment in life can be cathartic, but it also causes me to feel immense gratitude for the journey and personal growth.
Growth is painful and change is hard, but it’s not as difficult as being stuck. Chances are, we’re all going through a variation of pretty much the same thing, and we can learn so much about ourselves going forward by looking back. Choices in life propel us forward and teach us all about what we really want… love, acceptance and laughter.
I truly believe that ‘choosing you’ isn’t about being selfish. It’s about choosing health, healing and happiness.
